Pleasantly average chocolate milk that plays it right down the middle in all categories and doesn’t go into business for itself.
All in USA
Fairlife Smart Milkshakes Chocolate
Smooth and sweet— but I taste more stevia than honey. It’s not as blatant as some of the other Fairlife products, but neither is the chocolate presence. It could use a heavier dose of salt to bring out the cream, as it’s lacking flavor dimensionality.
Purity Chocolate Milk (pint)
Tons of flavor, with the cocoa nearly in equal proportion to the sweetness— providing a more mature, dessert-y type of feel that makes my heart sing. The creamy base does its job almost too well-- as it’s easy to drink too much of it too fast.
Prairie Farms Chocolate Milk
Strongly sweet, with an almost honey-ish bent; it fits together well with above-average saltiness and a super smooth and creamy medium. More cocoa wouldn’t hurt, but it’s far from broken and no need to fix it-- it’s objectively delicious.
Publix Chocolate Milk
Creamy, sweet, and enjoyable, but don’t expect your chocolate ‘itch’ to get scratched.
Purity Chocolate Milk (quart)
Has the confidence to rein in the sugar and ultimately let the cocoa flourish, with lots of help from the deliciously creamy solvent. It looks and feels substantial, which will make you savor it all the more.
Kroger Chocolate Breakfast Shake
Multivitamin scent and flavor (to a lesser extent), and feels like a mouthful of beach sand. You can chomp on the individual grains during and after each sip, and there’s an audible ‘crunch’ as you do so. It’s chalky, passably chocolaty, and from a taste perspective, you could do a lot worse in the ‘breakfast shake’ category.
Shamrock Farms Rockin' Refuel Lowfat Chocolate Milk
Sweet and chocolaty, with plenty of excusable chalk. The flavor is not to be overlooked here, it is rather strong and true— I must say that I’m both surprised and impressed. Your mouth will dry out from the heavy chalk, but you’ll effortlessly rationalize another sip, and another…
Sir Bananas (UHT)
If you’re paying close attention, you may notice actual tiny bits of banana that buoy to the surface, and you can feel them on your tongue— actually a welcome feature and pleasant surprise. The banana flavor is stronger than the cocoa flavor, but it’s a pleasantly unique drink that can be a nice change of pace.
Horizon Organic High Protein Chocolate Lowfat Milk
Has a unique, sharp malt flavor that outshines the cocoa flavor but should maintain your interest throughout. The powerful malt accentuates the ‘creamy’ aspect over the ‘sweet’ one, and it works rather well here.
Side Hill Acres Chocolate Goat Milk
Fairly bland upon first taste, then devolves to a grainy-ish, salty, yet creamy quality that’s difficult to adjust to. I’m left longing for more chocolate and a more satisfyingly punctuated finish.
Byrne Dairy Chocolate Milk
Super smooth, very creamy and malty, but not particularly chocolaty. Manages to feel indulgent without a significant flavor punch.
Clover Farms Chocolate Milk
Powerfully malty to an extent that you double-check the label, which says ‘chocolate.’ Lovers of malt will find this irresistible, those expecting chocolate will be disappointed. I like it more for its uniqueness than anything else— it’s a pleasant departure from the bog-standard chocolate milk you typically find in gas stations.
Pittsford Farms Dairy Chocolate Milk (473mL)
Salty, malty, and rather powdery— leaving your mouth dry and longing for stronger chocolate flavor. The creaminess is its best attribute and is executed well, but undercut by the powdery/grainy texture.
Arethusa Farm Chocolate Milk
Wow, just wow. Incredibly indulgent feeling, yet easy to drink. Salty, malty, creamy— all in excess, and I love it. It’s mature, balanced, and melts in your mouth— absolutely PHENOMENAL!
Shop Rite Lactose Free Lowfat Chocolate Milk
Surprisingly grainy, but otherwise nicely sweet and balanced chocolate milk. Does well to preserve a creamy flavor with only 1% fat as well.
![Ronnybrook Farm Dairy Creamline Chocolate Milk [glass]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5716b9cfb6aa603ffe76a080/1518202483656-HH8RP1WXHRPH7KDIZVOC/RonnybrookGlass_FrontR.jpg)
Ronnybrook Farm Dairy Creamline Chocolate Milk [glass]
Slightly thicker and ‘fuller’ than its 355mL plastic bottle counterpart (different formulation)— in this case it works to PERFECTION. The added skim milk powder gives it a more potent milkiness that adds punch to the overall flavor. Simply one of the best chocolate milks I’ve ever had.
Hudson Valley Fresh Chocolate Milk
A perfect example of where ‘thickness’ is justified by the creaminess. This is indulgent without being ostentatious, as the cream is more prominent than the cocoa, which comes through more in the latter half of the sip— as though the cream delivers it to the tongue and tiptoes away quietly— but you appreciate the act more so than the gift itself.
Trickling Springs Chocolate Milk
Buttery and smooth— superbly drinkable for a whole milk concoction. The cocoa flavor is subtle and mainly kicks in during the latter half of the sip.
Trickling Springs Organic Chocolate Milk
Awesomely creamy, but carries more of a sugary flavor than one of cocoa or malt. It’s not a huge detriment, but everything else is so good that it’s easy to pick on the quality that isn’t quite there. Still, a very strong recommendation— this stuff is great.