Sweet and creamy, though the texture doesn’t quite distribute in the mouth like you’d hope— it feels a touch more coagulative than the ‘real’ stuff.

Nastily and distractingly sweet with a unnatural crescendo in the latter half of the sip. The texture is chalky and under-milky, even for 1%. This isn’t good, folks.

Sweet, minty, creamy, and modestly (but adequately) chocolaty, this is a fine addition to the holiday season that is tasty enough for year-round availability in the dairy case, though marketers ostensibly feel (perhaps rightly so?) that chocolate mint milk requires a gimmick for mainstream appeal.

The fat content outperforms its ‘reduced’ (2%) billing from a creaminess standpoint, lending an indulgence supported (but not highlighted) by cocoa flavor.

Safely and competently treads the middle ground; you won’t find anything unexpected here, be it for better or worse.

Straightforwardly delicious, whole chocolate milk that easily could be the standard for university creameries across the nation. Everything looks and feels in place, it doesn’t take a lot of risks, but doesn’t need to in order to warm the heart.

Excellent creamy focus that strikes the delicate balance of flavor and mouthfeel. A strong salt quotient supports this and seems to be the main driver of the experience (not in a bad way), but the chocolate exists much more in the background, perhaps as a secondary or even tertiary feature behind cream and malt.

Wow! The first sip is an education, the second sip is for confirmation, and all remaining sips are pure, unadulterated recreation. If normal ‘great’ chocolate milk is akin to melted ice cream, this is melted Haagen Dazs, and time spent not in pursuit of this chocolate milk should be considered wasteful and foolhardy!

Fantastically mature cocoa flavor that coalesces seamlessly with velvety smooth cream, capped with a knowing nod to the wild; all aspects are honed to such a high degree of quality. Chocolate milk aficionados would be extremely remiss to pass up this experience afforded by Rivendale.

Melted chocolate butter— what more can you say. I will forever remember where I stood in that Connellsville, PA public parking lot when my insides were first graced with this gloriously indulgent, refulgent, buttery bliss of a beverage. The name makes sense to me now.

An interesting, almost ‘slippery’ feel that you quickly warm to as the subtle flavor begins to sink in. It’s plenty creamy, and leaves a bit of a cocoa powder residue once the cream ebbs. There’s a sophistication to it that encourages the sip over the gulp, and I respect it for that.

Noticeably better (read: milkier, creamier) texture than the (seemingly same) product stored in plastic, but it’s definitely a better drinking and tasting experience. A slightly salty kick rounds out each sip that accentuates the cream and curtails any potential aftertaste funk.

Seems to be lacking the cream that you might expect from that extra 0.5% above the typical lowfat (which is present in the cartoned version). Nonetheless, an amply chocolaty experience in an eye-catching package that can hold its own in the mid-tier.

No shortage of flavor, though a bit reliant on sweetness to carry it through. Each sip starts and ends sweet, and there’s cocoa in between but there’s nearly a syrupy quality to it that lingers in the throat beyond its curfew.

Brilliant aesthetics and texture, the creamy base delivers a smooth, temperately chocolaty wave from lips to liver. It’s not ostentatious, but reliably gets the job done without gimmicks or excess baggage.

Unique combination of ‘milky’ flavor with a modestly earthy cocoa tinge. It has an excellent look and feel, and when you’re finished, you have one of the most attractive milk cartons ever made to do with as you wish (mantle piece?). 

Thin, creamy, and underserved on the ‘taste’ side of the ledger. Given its decent base, it doesn’t require strong flavor to be enjoyable, but it would benefit greatly from leveling up the chocolate piece.

Solidly chocolaty and fairly sweet— mired only by a slight cloying aftertaste that kicks in a couple seconds post-gulp. The flavor in the beginning half of the sip is rather decent, it just tries to hang on too long.