1,823 chocolate milks | 52 countries | currently scouring my fridge for more...
All tagged High Protein
Refreshingly unsweet, with a heft that would suggest more flavor than it actually carries. There’s a bit of an aftertaste that is a departure from ‘milky’ or ‘chocolaty’ but overall, its focus on cocoa (without a sugary crutch) is unique and honorable.
Unsettlingly girthy and sweet beyond what the law should allow. I peeled off the label and was expecting to see ‘Diabetes in a Jug’ underneath. It’s far too thick and sugary to attempt to discern other flavors and properties, frankly, if you’re past the age of 11, I can’t in good faith recommend.
Beefy feel, and a nigh-stinging sweetness that ultimately dominates the cocoa, veering the Hershey’s-licensed flavor into its rightly ‘candified’ domain. It feels fortified, and carries a chalkiness that strays from its milky roots. Ultimately, you could do a lot worse from a taste perspective in the ‘fortified’ market— but when compared with elite chocolate milk, the flavor gap is much more pronounced than the protein gap.
Girthy, chalky, and a restrained flavor profile that deftly avoids funkiness. Drink this for its impressive characteristics if you must, but look elsewhere for more hedonistic pursuits.
Mildly creamy, yet chalky and super bland. Chocolate is nowhere to be found, and a faint, pleasant malt flavor struggles in earnest to shine under a dim spotlight. It’s a bit drying to the mouth after each swallow, though a bit more subtle than most other high-protein chocolate milks.
The same, signature Fairlife twang plugged into a more clotted base. The sweetness is distractingly unnatural and significantly hampers the experience. I get that the nutrition stats are attractive (low sugar, high protein) and it serves that market well, but from a flavor standpoint, it doesn’t quite do whole milk justice.
It probably won’t stab you to death in the shower. That’s the only positive thing I can say about it. You won’t question the ‘no sugar added’ claim on the front, but you may ponder how many brushings it will take to erase the flavor from your mouth, and how much bleach you’ll have to huff to dull the memory.
A rotten, chalkier emulation of Fairlife. Everything is second rate, from the sickly gray substance that slithers out of the hole to the ‘what-sweetness-exists-is-obviously-fake’ flavor, to the starchy, drying finish. Awful.
Less sweet than expected, and unfortunately marked by a damp cardboard-like soy protein flavor. I’ve certainly had worse, especially in the ‘recovery’ tranche, but given the high calorie nature, I’d much rather spend those on the normal Penn State chocolate milk.
The sweeteners seem to be in competition and ultimately dominate the experience. A honey-like note kicks off the sip, but by the end, you have a saliva-inducing essence plaguing your tongue. In the interim, there’s too much chalk and not enough cocoa to salvage a respectable score.
Sweet, chocolaty, and decently (but not distractingly) chalky. There’s lots of flavor and it’s surprisingly well balanced— overall, one of the better tasting protein-fortified chocolate milks out there.
Dark, bold, mature cocoa flavor that is drinkable through the wondrous confluence of science and agriculture. It’s the perfect size (4.5oz / 135mL) for something so indulgent, in that it not only prevents over exposure, but it forces one to drink it slowly and truly appreciate the experience. The future of chocolate milk for adults, and perhaps the future of dessert itself.
A searing sweetness pierces through the formidable chocolate flavor, and ultimately sets the back of your throat ablaze with small, sugary lightning bolts. It still tastes ‘good’ but is a bit gluttonous with the ‘sweet’ lever. Avoid if you’re prone to diabetic shock.
Thick and chalky— akin to the fluid they make you drink before a colonoscopy (so I’ve heard). Drinking this whole bottle may be equally as unpleasant (as the procedure, not the prep fluid).
Rather bland, with a somewhat artificial bent to the sweetness (though it does not contain artificial sweeteners). Otherwise, it's fairly bland and unobtrusive, does a nice job of hiding the fortification (tastewise), but could use some salt to add another needed flavor dimension.
Tastes like a chocolate popsicle that had been lurking in the back of the freezer for months past its ‘sell-by’ curfew. You know the kind— it’s covered in icy particles, which, due to the lack of other options, you give a cursory brush-off before thrusting the pop into your warm piehole in a vulgar act of misguided desperation. This chocolate milk embodies that experience.
Wow— super strong cocoa flavor, paired with a mature, undersweet sourness that delivers a haymaker of deliciousness! It offers what I desire most in chocolate milk exceedingly well— creaminess unencumbered by viscosity, brilliantly indulgent and punchy mature cocoa flavor, and a unique had-nearly-one-thousand-chocolate-milks-but-nothing-quite-like-this factor that puts this into rarefied orbit for me.
Immediate flavor rushes in with each sip— a rather welcome guest that stays just a bit too long. The artificial sweeteners are present but on good behavior, and despite a chalky medium, there’s plenty to like about this. It’s strongly salty, which outlasts the other flavors for the most part, but makes it easy to return for more.
Unnaturally thick texture which doesn't feel milky. It is reminiscent of Fairlife, but definitely not an improvement (despite a little more protein and a bit more sugar). It does have stronger than average cocoa flavor, but suffers from a lack of a salty presence.
A powdery, grainy feel and soy flavor highlight the experience, and limit the score significantly. It doesn't have a ‘bad’ flavor for what it is, but it carries more of a fruity sweetness than a ‘Rich Chocolate Taste’ that the label touts.
