Lidl Chocolate Milk

One of the most generic-looking packages I've seen, but the taste is actually quite punchy— lots of sweetness, adequate cocoa, decent amount of salt, and an almost caramel-y finish that works pretty well.

Reed's Gourmet Chocolate Milk

Fantastic chocolate flavor and salty/sweet levels. The texture is quite thick and has lots of particulates that will adhere to the inside of the glass (it has potato flakes in it). From a taste standpoint, it’s outstanding, I wish the texture were a bit thinner/smoother. Minor gripe.

Saputo Crispy Crunch Chocolate Milkshake

I was expecting some sort of ‘crispy’ aggregate suspended in the milk, but instead I guess it’s an attempt to emulate a crunchy toffee bar(?). It does deliver sufficiently on that but it's a bit too sweet for me, and the toffee experience is not one that is enhanced through flavored milk, in my view. Still flavorful enough to be considered average despite the drawbacks.

Nestle Rolo Milk Shake

Wow- I wasn't prepared for the ambush of flavor that this would wreak on my buds. It's sweet as heck, akin to drinking caramel straight from the Rolo factory spigot; a pretty indulgent feeling experience that was executed well.

Rumble SuperShake Dutch Cocoa

If ‘potting soil’ and ‘paint thinner’ had a baby, this would be the amniotic fluid. This isn’t really chocolate milk in the purest sense, it’s definitely a ‘health shake’— and it may deliver on that, but if it’s taste you’re after, spread garbage disposal gleanings on a cracker instead.